The living and the dead. Theblessed and the cursed. The bold and the coward.
Some of us may value life andare grateful for all the things we have achieved. But usually, weunknowingly take it for granted as well. And who can tell us aboutthe life we live better than the Dying. They have lived their lifeand have been through the mistakes and hurdles that have shapedtheir opinions and experiences.
生與死，福與禍，勇與懦。
有人珍視生命，感恩所得到的一切。但通常人們不知不覺地就認(rèn)為所得到的一切是理所當(dāng)然的。可又有誰會(huì)告訴我們現(xiàn)在所過的生活比垂死更好呢？每個(gè)人都過著自己的生活，犯過的錯(cuò)、跨過的障礙，總結(jié)出經(jīng)驗(yàn)，形成了自己的觀念。
In 2009, Bronnie Ware, apalliative care nurse, wrote an online article to uncover anyregrets and secrets from her patients to learn from their mistakes.In her book, "Top Five Regrets Of The Dying" Bronnie revealed thatall her patients spoke about things like relationships, love,personal matters rather than money, success, fame.
Have you noticed that most of usdo the opposite? We run behind success, fame, money, status,anything materialistic, while the other important matters in ourlife just lay waste. It's human nature to want more. The need fordesire doesn't seem to end. No matter how much we achieve, it'snever enough.
One thing is for sure. If wedie, we only have 6 ft of dirt to our name. That'sall.
Here are the Top Ten regretsheard on a deathbed, including the 5 most popular ones from thebook, "The Top Five Regrets Of Dying."
一位名叫布隆尼．威爾的臨終關(guān)懷護(hù)士，于2009年在網(wǎng)上發(fā)布了一篇文章，是關(guān)于病人臨終前的秘密和后悔的事。后來她又出了一本書《病人臨終五大后悔之事》，她所看護(hù)的病人與她談?wù)摰亩际顷P(guān)于人際關(guān)系、愛和私事，而非金錢、成功、名譽(yù)。
可你是否注意到我們大多數(shù)人追求的卻都是后者：成功、名譽(yù)、金錢、地位等物質(zhì)化的東西，卻忽視了生活中其他重要的東西。人性，就是貪得無厭。欲望這個(gè)東西，就是個(gè)無底洞。不管我們擁有多少，都不夠。
但有一件事是可以肯定的，如果我們?nèi)ナ懒?，只?英尺的地方就夠了。
以下是病人臨終時(shí)最后悔的10件事，包括書里面提到的5件事。
1.I wish I had the courage tolive a life true to myself, not the life others expected ofme.
1、沒有勇氣活出真正的自己，而只是別人眼中的自己。
This was one of the most commonregrets found among the dying. It was realized that people mainlyfocus on things they couldn't do that they really wanted to do.Because of personal issues or circumstances, they had to makecertain choices which resulted in some people not even realizingtheir dreams and aspirations.
這一點(diǎn)是最為常見的。我們發(fā)現(xiàn)大家都會(huì)做一些不能做、但又特別想要做的事情。出于個(gè)人問題或環(huán)境，人們必須得做選擇，結(jié)果，很多人都沒能實(shí)現(xiàn)自己的夢想。
2.I spent my entire life in mycomfort zone.
2、一輩子待在的舒適區(qū)，從未有過突破。
"A comfort zone is a beautifulplace, but nothing ever grows there." They were afraid to takerisks. Do you know when a life is truly wasted? When monotony takesover. You turned your back on the excitement you craved so much.Escaping the confinement of comfort is a struggle for anyone atfirst. But once you do, there wouldn't be any space toregret.
有人說：“待在舒適區(qū)真的很愜意，但卻不會(huì)有長進(jìn)。”這些人害怕冒險(xiǎn)。你知道生命何時(shí)是無意義的嗎？千篇一律的時(shí)候。你逃避著你所渴望的一切。當(dāng)然對(duì)每個(gè)人來說，逃出舒適區(qū)真的不易，但只要你邁出第一步，你就再也不會(huì)回頭了。
3.I wish I had let myself behappier.
3、沒能讓自己更幸福。
Many didn't realize this buthappiness was actually an option for them. They just didn't givethemselves a chance. It was found that trying to please others,fear of change, fear of rejection, and the general habits theyformed in their lives had, in fact, prevented them from happiness.When you're on your deathbed, what others think of you is notrelevant at all. Just when patients were a little time away fromdeath, they realized the difference it made to not care about otherpeople's opinions.
許多人都沒意識(shí)到這一點(diǎn)。幸福就是一種選擇，而很多人卻沒有選擇它。我們發(fā)現(xiàn)很多人都在盡力去取悅他人、害怕改變、害怕拒絕，生活中形成的一些惡習(xí)也將自己與幸福隔絕。人們在臨終之時(shí)發(fā)現(xiàn)，別人如何看待自己和幸福一點(diǎn)關(guān)系都沒有，所以，根本不用在乎他人的看法。
4.I shouldn't have worked sohard.
4、不該工作用力過猛。
This regret was mostly foundamong males. They felt like they had failed to spend any worthwhiletime with their families. They missed their children growing up infront of them. They must be present in a physical form, but theywere never truly present. The same would be in the case ofrelationships. Work was given more importance and time passed bytoo fast for them. They blinked and they missed almosteverything.
大多數(shù)男性對(duì)這一點(diǎn)深有體會(huì)。他們覺得沒能花時(shí)間陪伴家人，錯(cuò)過了孩子的成長。雖然活著，卻早已死了。與家人之間的關(guān)系也是形同虛設(shè)。工作至上，時(shí)間流逝，眨眼之間，錯(cuò)過所有。
5.I wish I had the courage toexpress my feelings.
5、要是敢于表達(dá)自己的想法就好了。
Are you familiar with the quote,"Some people die at 27, they are only buried at 72." This applieshere greatly. You know what is more deadly than death? Stifledfeelings. Many people felt that they had repressed their feelingsin order to maintain the peace between things. At that moment, itfelt like it would be rewarding later. After hearing the regret,clearly, it wasn't worth it. Many of the patients developedillnesses because of their repressed feelings and hiding behind amask.
“有人27歲就死了，卻到了72歲才埋葬。”這句被瘋狂引用的句子，大家是否熟悉？你知道比死更致命的是什么嗎？是窒息感。很多人覺得為了維持和平，就不能輕易表達(dá)自己的情感，還以為這樣就會(huì)你好我好大家好了。豈不知，這是不值得的。許多病人生病的原因都是因?yàn)樗麄儔阂肿约海瑐窝b自己。
6.I wish I had stayed in touchwith my friends.
6、希望可以和朋友更加親密一些。
It happens. People go separateways and in order to grow more, people are okay with the fact ofnot talking to someone who was a friend. It's considered normal tojust forget people after you've lost touch with them. Every "Weshould catch up" turns into a formality. On a deathbed, people feltlike maybe, they should have been the first person to call or thefirst person to make a plan. Dying patients realized how much theyvalued old friends until it's too late and it wasn't possible totrack anyone down.
人們有時(shí)就是會(huì)這樣：為了自己的前途，選擇離開一些朋友，沒有知心的朋友也都無所謂。沒了聯(lián)系，漸漸忘記，再正常不過了?！坝锌粘鰜沓詡€(gè)飯?。 边@句話都成為一句禮貌語了。對(duì)于臨終的人來說，真后悔沒能主動(dòng)去聯(lián)系朋友，隔段時(shí)間聚聚。他們意識(shí)到多么珍視曾經(jīng)的舊友，但為時(shí)已晚了，早已無力挽回。
7.I didn't take care of mybody.
7、忽視自己的健康狀況。
Whether it be drinking, smoking,drugs, or compulsive eating, it might feel like you would liveforever at that moment, but slowly you'll know you were wrong. Someeven said that when they were younger, they didn't care about dyingbecause life was considered 'too short' to care about these things.How much ever you feel like a brave person, nobody wants to facedeath or just end themselves. You only have one body. A positiveand an enduring body would have made it easier for you to deal withlife.
喝酒、吸煙、吸毒、暴飲暴食，當(dāng)人們這么做的時(shí)候，根本就想不到躺在病床上的那一天，放任自由。不久，你就會(huì)知道自己大錯(cuò)特錯(cuò)了。有人曾說過，在年輕的時(shí)候，根本不會(huì)考慮到有一天會(huì)倒下，因?yàn)樗麄冇X得生命太短暫了，無暇在意這些事情。你覺得自己有多勇敢呢？沒有人愿意面對(duì)死亡，因?yàn)樯挥幸淮?。而一副精力十足、健康的身體會(huì)讓你更容易處理生活中的問題。
8.I let anger get the best ofme.
8、我總是生氣。
Have you heard this quote?"Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech youwill ever regret." It's natural to be angry and sometimes evenjustified. But, we cannot let anger control us. It takes over andwe say cruel words that we can never take back again. The damage isalready done, how much ever you try to fix it lateranyway.
“生氣的時(shí)候就大聲表達(dá)，那會(huì)是多么的鏗鏘有力?！甭犨^這句話吧？生氣，是很正常的事，有時(shí)甚至不生氣都不對(duì)。但是我們不能讓怒氣控制了我們。生氣的時(shí)候，會(huì)口不擇言，說出的話如同潑出去的水，覆水難收。而造成的傷害，是你日后無論多努力都很難再修復(fù)的。
9.I spent too much time aroundtoxic people.
9、與負(fù)面人物接觸，浪費(fèi)精力。
When you're on your deathbed,you realize that not everyone in your life was benefitting you inyour growth as a human being. Some would even pull you down andspread poison in your life. You later realize how much of yourenergy went into appeasing everyone, even if they disrespected youor treated you poorly. You should always be around people whosupport you and lift you.
躺在病床上，你意識(shí)到在生活中，不是每一個(gè)人都會(huì)幫助你成長。有的人會(huì)拖你后腿，給你帶來負(fù)面影響。不久之后你就會(huì)知道，即使這些人不尊敬你、態(tài)度惡劣，但你浪費(fèi)了很多精力去讓步、取悅。你應(yīng)該多去接近那些可以幫助你，促使你進(jìn)步的人。
10.I should have quit myjob.
10、不該在一份不愛做的工作上耗到底。
One of the major regrets thathave been commonly heard on a deathbed is that "I should have quitmy job." You slogged away at a job you hated your entire life, andin the end, it wasn't even worth it. Do something you love, andthat job stops being work for you. Soon, that job would become theone thing you would want to look forward to when you wake up in themorning.
后悔之最就是聽到病床上的人說“我就不應(yīng)該在那份工作耗到底”。你這輩子都干著一份討厭無比的工作，埋頭苦干，結(jié)果，根本不值得。做你愛做的事，你就不再是工作的奴隸了。不久之后，在某天早晨醒來，你就會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)這工作是你一直期望的。
臨死之前，最后悔的10件事
譯者：低頭麥穗 原文作者： SADIYADHANANI
