7月28日雅思大作文范文
Some people who have been in prison become good citizens. Some people therefore think that they are the best people to talk to school students the danger of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
高分范文
01
Many criminals can be reformed people after they serve their time in jail. [習(xí)語(yǔ)表達(dá)：serve the/somebody’s time] Since their faults have been rectified [原形rectify], I would, if I were a school principal, [故意設(shè)計(jì)一個(gè)虛擬語(yǔ)氣，豐富語(yǔ)法現(xiàn)象] invite those ex-criminals to help my teachers foster students’ good behavior.
02
The primary consideration is that [引導(dǎo)表語(yǔ)從句] those former offenders’ real-life cases are lessons that are more convincing than what an effective teacher could be. Teachers may [在這里不表可能性，表讓步] demonstrate numerous examples in their classes; however, those cases may not be as authentic and compelling as they should be until they are told by an ex-criminal in person. Teachers may [在這里不表可能性，表讓步] be role models in behavior; students may however develop no clear awareness of abiding by [abide by the rules unless they actually see the consequences of breaking them.[兩個(gè)長(zhǎng)難句組成此段落的重要內(nèi)容，注意比較teachers和ex-criminals的對(duì)比，是內(nèi)容設(shè)計(jì)的關(guān)鍵] Both situations are where [引導(dǎo)名詞詞組] reformed ex-criminals should be invited into classrooms.
03
In addition, teachers do not compare with [這個(gè)詞組用主動(dòng)語(yǔ)態(tài)時(shí)意義為“比得上”] ex-criminals for their likely patronizing [原形：patronize or intimidating [原形：intimidate] attitude is undesirable. Those corrected and changed criminals are otherwise humble. When patronized or frightened [原形：frighten], students, young and prone to be rebellious, may be provoked [原形：provoke] and act against rules knowingly. This is a risk that no school would like to take. Instead, a modest attitude is more welcome. Former criminals, unlike teachers, who may act like saints, are regretful about the harm and damage they have caused and thus often adopt a gentle and moderate attitude. [長(zhǎng)難句]
[如果可以在body部分設(shè)計(jì)2-3個(gè)長(zhǎng)難句，也就2-3個(gè)足夠了，語(yǔ)言表述部分會(huì)有提分]
04
In conclusion, it is an adoptable proposition that [引導(dǎo)主語(yǔ)從句] former offenders who have turned over a new leaf [習(xí)語(yǔ)表達(dá)：turn over a new leaf] can be good teachers for students learning to behave. Since they have changed, they are safe. Most importantly, they have the potential to outperform professional teachers.
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